BLAME JOHNSON FOR THE CLOSURE OF HOSTELS

 

LATEST BREXIT DISASTER – 20 YOUTH HOSTELS TO CLOSE

BREXIT and the pandemic – but mostly Brexit - has led to the sale of 20 Youth Hostels in England and Wales, it was reported last month.

This is the latest own-goal for those 17 million Leavers who voted for the UK to abandon the European Union in 2016, the consequences of which are still unfolding.

There are many reports charting Britain’s fall to impoverishment since then, which the Pandemic, the Russian war on the Ukraine and inflation have added to.

The opposite view – that everything is now rosy since turning our backs on Europe – is laid out in a wooly  government report which has the hand of the liar and architect of Brexit  ex-MP Boris Johnson all over it and seemed to me about as real as castles in the air.

So, fair to say the closure of hostels is Johnson’s fault. By the way,  it is reported that this silver spooned professional bull shitter has earned £1million from three dinner speaking engagements since leaving office this year.

Meanwhile, leaving the EU has cost the UK £40 billion in lost tax revenue and the benefits of trading as a member of the EU.

Despite the claim that the UK would no longer rely on the EU for trade, the  EU remains our main trading partner. However, the cost of importing and exporting goods has soared because we no longer enjoy the trading benefits that came with membership.

Complex bureaucracy to move goods across borders  has replaced frictionless trade and resulted in a number of UK businesses folding.

Our economy is now 5.5 per cent smaller than it would have been has we remained with in the EU.

Now Brexit is impacting on one of the jewels of the British tourist industry, the Youth Hostels Association (YHA), founded in England in 1930.

The YHA story broke a month or two ago in The Guardian with a story by John Harris, and in the Telegraph and across social media.

The Guardian learned from insiders how Brexit has hugely reduced the numbers of school trips from abroad, so hitting a crucial part of the Association’s revenue.

Since Brexit many foreign schools have found it too difficult to negotiate the complex bureaucracy now in place to visit the UK since the ending of free movement - a key proponent of the Leave campaign which wanted to keep foreign workers out.   

As a result the YHA may have to shut a third of its 150 hostels. There are 20 up for sale and 30 more listed as likely to go the same way.

It is hoped that buyers will want to keep running the facilities as independent hostels, but it is feared many will be turned into luxury homes. And that will be truly ironic,   disgraceful, given that the movement was originally formed to enable youngsters of limited means to escape the towns and cities and discover the countryside.

“Youth” hostels? Its misnomer these days for the Association has for years welcomed all ages and all nationalities through its doors. At one time the rule was you had to arrive under your own steam - on foot, cycling or canoe!

Falling attendances saw the Association relax this rule long ago in a bid to boost visitor numbers and now hostellers no longer have to get a sweat on and can arrive in cars and coaches.

This altered the dynamics of the hostel somewhat, as those of us arriving tired but fulfilled from our exertions and requiring nothing more than a good meal and the plain comforts of an armchair in the common room, came face to face with “others”, who arrived cold and looking for entertainment.

Yet the original spirit of the organisation still holds good, “to encourage young people (of all ages) to a greater knowledge, use and love of the countryside.”

The list of hostels to go on the market include: Patterdale in the Lake District, the Peak District village of Eyam, Poppit Sands in West Wales, the Somerset town of Minehead, Cheddar in the Mendip Hills, Kington in Herefordshire, and at Haworth, West Yorkshire.

Like many, I have enjoyed staying in hostels, mostly on cycling tours over the years, enjoying the simple pleasures. 

Castleton  Losehill Hall Youth Hostel
in the Peak District National Park.

I stayed with club mates at Capel Curig in the heart of beautiful Snowdonia in North Wales one December. That evening a thunderstorm knocked out the power, and we sat up by candlelight telling each other ghost stories.

We rode away the next morning on a light dusting of snow, forked lightning streaking across the sky and thunder echoing off the mountains.

I spent a night at Slaidburn on the Lancashire Fells, where I was the only guest and invited to share dinner with the warden and his wife. They waived the usual requirement of overnighters, to complete a task before leaving, sweeping the dormitory for instance.
Or, as was the case in Castleton hostel, Derbyshire, where club mate Dave Davis and myself were landed with the washing up to spare youngsters in a school party. The warden thought it unfair to expect kids, mostly aged about 10 and 11, to wash  up heavy pots and pans of porridge oats and dozens of plates and dishes.

At Abergavenny I was again the sole occupant and after a hard days ride was perfectly content to take my rest alone in the common room that evening, listening to the solitary and solid tick of the grandfather clock towering in the corner.

And two and half miles from home is Tanners Hatch, a delightful old cottage on the edge of the woods reached by bridleways over the Surrey North Downs. Tanners was graded simple with one dormitory for men one for women at the time, although it looks to have been tarted up since then and is now classed as a “one star hotel” with apartments. There is also camping.  Back in the day you did your own cooking. The toilet block was outside and there was only ice cold water to wash in.

My family once spent an enjoyable night there with other parents and their children on a primary school nature outing. We listened to wild life expert tell us about the creatures of the night, owls, bats and badgers. We visited a badgers’ sett in the woods.

Our genial host was the warden, the late Graham Peddie MBE, a remarkable and generous character who also ran Pit Stop for the homeless in nearby Leatherhead.

Good times.

 

Surrey Police took no action because of staff shortages

 

|I have now received a response from Surrey Police to my complaint about their decision to take no action against the driver who crashed into me (see previous blog).

 I specifically complained that the police had left it too late (over 30 days) before obtaining CCTV coverage which may have shown evidence of the collision.  The tape was wiped after 30 days.

 The solicitors acting for me in my claim for damages tell me it is quite common for the police to take no action in “minor” cases.

The email responding to my complaint was sent to me from the Investigating Officer, Professional Standards Department, Surrey Police HQ.

 Basically it says staffing levels meant they were unable to get hold of the CCTV coverage in time, before it was wiped. 

 He suggested I seek redress through the driver’s car insurance for damages and injuries as he stopped, apologised and exchanged details with me.

I was told that it may not have been in the public interest to prosecute the driver for driving without due care and attention as the CPS are equally limited in what resources they have available to them.

The letter confirmed the first letter and said no further action will be taken, considering this explanation to be a reasonable and proportionate response.

They offered a sincere apology and wished me all the best.

 

I have responded to the Investigating Officer, thus:

 

  Dear Sir,

 Thank you responding to my complaint.

Clearly I cannot expect the police to take further action if, as you say, this minor road traffic collision case was dropped because of staff shortages and case overload at the CPS.

So much for the slogan once to be seen on the side your vehicles: 

“With you making Surrey safer”.

But hey, no one died. Possibly due to staff shortages in the Grim Reaper’s office.

Do excuse my bitterness. I do appreciate the difficulty faced by the police over staff shortages. So many vital services are adversely affected in this way, most notably by the NHS.

My solicitors have paid the police fee to obtain details of the driver’s insurance company and they expect to wait a few months before they receive the information. Due to staff shortages, probably.

How long does it take to press “copy” and “send”?

A number of unexplained issues trouble me. I would like to know if these were considered or not. 

According to the law negligence or carelessness while driving which leads to a crash may merit a prosecution.

If for no other reason than to, hopefully,  make the driver more aware of his/her responsibilities in the future, in a bid to make hazardous road conditions less so.

The disproportionate consequences of “careless” driving cannot be underestimated yet are not taken into account, except in extreme cases when the victim is either killed or receives life-changing injuries.

In my case I escaped with broken hands, cuts and bruises and a battered rib cage, not to mention the shock to my family where I am a carer.

The driver who caused this has got off scot-free. Although I imagine he may be troubled by the memory of what happened and relieved that I walked.

I can never forget what happened. After 66 years of cycling I can no longer go riding. I’ve been scared off the roads.

His apology to me while appreciated might also be considered as admittance of guilt.

Among the actions considered careless  are: “pulling out from a side road into the path of another vehicle” – as more or less happened in this case.

Was he not concentrating? Was he in a hurry?

Did the attending officers speak to the people who kindly helped me while I awaited the ambulance? Did any of these people witness the crash?

Was the driver tested at the scene for drink/drugs?

Had he been using a mobile phone?

In short, just what was it that caused him to drive his ton of metal into me?

I didn’t just fall out of the sky! 

Perhaps too many drivers are far too laid back these days in cars which are too easy to drive.

I will sign off with this old news story about a doctor in A&E who, sickened by the daily carve up regularly served him, came up with a solution  to help concentrate the minds of drivers, to reduce the risks they often inadvertently take.

He recommended cars be made of plywood and have a six-inch steel tungsten spike fitted in the steering column.

 

 

 

 

 

 

SURREY POLICE - A GROSS DERELICTION OF DUTY

Part 2 of this saga coming soon...how Surrey Police responded to this criticism

Easter Sunday morning was the last time I cycled in the fresh air. I was hit broadside by a car which swung across onto my side of the road. Into my periphery vision, at speed, rushed a windscreen looming larger than life. 

The bonnet seemed to go under me. WHAM I was struck by a weight, a force so great I cannot describe it. A force which reverberated through my entire body. I am on the ground on swollen hands and knees….what the? Lots of people all around me, helping me. 

 An ambulance is coming, someone says. 

 The police turn up. 

Why did they bother? Pa

The police let me down.

 Four months later I am shocked to learn from Surrey police that they will not be taking any action on this case….! Did those people who came to my aid not see anything? I discover that the police failed to take a look at available CCTV coverage before it was wiped! 

I have accused them of gross dereliction of duty. A former officer tells me he is not surprised, he knows them as “Sorry Police”. 

 My formal complaint is in the post….as follows… 

 The Chief Executive Office of the Police and Crime Commissioner PO Box 412 Guildford Surrey GU3 1BR Dear Madam or Sir, I am lodging this complaint in writing as well as via your formal online procedure because I have lack of faith in the IT system which managed to record an incorrect address for me. 

This concerns RTA collision ref: 0196 SYP-20230409-0196, which details a collision between a car and myself riding a bicycle – I was hit broadside on by the vehicle swinging at right angles from one side of the road to the other, directly into my path and hitting me side on. The Police have informed me no action will be taken in this case. 

My complaint concerns what I consider to be a gross dereliction of duty in police enquiries into this collision, which took place on London Road, Dorking, adjacent to the ESSO filling station at 09.35 on Sunday, April 9, 2023. Easter Sunday morning. 

I am in receipt of an email from a gentleman at Surrey Police HQ who signs it on behalf of the chief constable and he informs me that the CCTV at the garage was not checked by the officers and I quote: CCTV “was not checked by the attending officer as the manager was not present. CCTV for such premises has a sell-by date of 30 days, our unit picked this file up well over a month later by which time the CCTV had been wiped.” 

He added, on behalf of the chief constable, that he was sorry if this is not what I wanted to hear.

 To which I will say, no, it is not what I wanted to hear. 

Because of this inefficiency, possible evidence was lost. I will add that Dorking police station is approximately 200 metres away from the Esso Garage. 

 I received two broken hands, various grazes including a cut to the head – my helmet was smashed - and severe bruising to my rib cage. I am full time carer for my daughter and my injuries required me to employ professional care for some essential duties my role as carer demands. The bike escaped serious damage. 

 The stress to my family is considerable.

 I will add I am a former competition cyclist with over 60 years riding experience who until that Sunday morning had never been in a collision. Fear of a repeat has obliged me to hang up my wheels. At the very least the police owe me a full explanation as to why they have failed to give me justice.

GOVERNMENT ACCUSED OF 'SYSTEMIC FAILURE' ON CYCLING PROVISION

 

With parts of the world going up in flames as a result of the unprecedented heatwave  caused by climate change, stoked by the burning of fossil fuels, it may seem churlish to raise the matter of cycling issues again, as we all speed ever onward – by road and by air - towards Hell.

But hey, why not?

Especially as the National Highways has been accused of “systemic failure” on cycling provision, as revealed in freedom of information requests.

Admittedly, this is small beer compared to government failings to follow through its policies to tackle global warming but it’s all connected. Improving road safety for cycling is one way to reduce car dependency, and so reduce pollution.

It’s not only the Conservatives wavering on imposing schemes to reduce traffic, but Labour, too, and all because they fear losing votes at the ballot box. This would seem to fly in the face of reports saying the public will back action to slow down climate change.

Nevertheless, government fears a driver backlash from people who don’t want to stop driving.

The question to put to them is will they become cannibals and start eating each other once the heatwave eventually causes crop failure.

Anyway, before we all start tucking in to our neighbours, here is the latest revelations on government incompetence re: cycling safety.

According to a report in The Guardian (28 July) by Laura Laker, National Highways has spent £84m on 160 cycling and walking projects since 2015, “but has stated via written questions and Fol requests that it is unable to say exactly what it spent the money on, or the impact of the investment on cycle use and safety”.

Dangerous cycle lane through a bus stop in Kingston, Surrey.

We’ve known for years how government has failed to provide the £billions necessary to meet their own targets of a 50 per cent increase in cycling and walking.

According to transport consultant Phil Jones, co-author of the National Highways own cycle traffic design standards (CD195), the government is “failing to meet the needs of the main active travel user (cyclists) in rural areas.”

That’s the killer here, the Department for Transport has an excellent design guide, which is largely ignored by traffic planners and they are allowed to get away it.

Jones accuses National Highways of a “systemic failure” to apply its own standards and says he knows from his own experience this is leading to poor provision.

Such as creating shared use facilities on pavements with walkers in built up areas where they were never intended to be because of possible conflict at busy times of day.

And what’s more, the government know this. Worse, they have actively conspired to allow authorities to sidestep the official design guidelines and lay down substandard, often dangerous cycle lanes.

It appears that transport planners are using a loophole in the National Highways own design guidelines which can result in poor cycle infrastructure.

I know for a fact that Surrey Highways who have produced some spectacularly bad cycle infrastructure claim that the Department for Transport allowed for sub-standard – or less than perfect as they preferred to say - works if planners were unable to follow the guidelines!

Unable translates to either being unwilling to pay for or unable to afford to do a half-decent job.

To back up my findings, the article quotes a minister for transport, Richard Holden MP, admitting that it was not always applying CD195 on rural roads!

One of the biggest issues facing cyclists are the inadequate crossing points on A-roads and motorways which make cycling perilous. It has been like this for nigh on 80 years, since dual carriageways were first built with cycle lanes down either side of them lacking rights of way at side roads and no provision at major junctions or roundabouts.

Allez.

 

 

 

 

AUTISM - 10 MADDENING TRAITS OF BEHAVIOUR

 

I am going to attempt to explain Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA), as discussed by two eminent doctors in the field of autism.  They have clarified for us several traits of behaviour we have come to recognise and this is extremely helpful and makes up for our frustration in many ways, knowing this is common with autistic people and those with hypermobility Ehlers Danlos syndrome

Bear with me while I set the scene with an illustration of the life of the chronically ill who have PDA, and the effect this can have on the carers looking after them seven days a week, 356 days year  - with only shopping and essential appointments to break the stultifying routine.

This can involve as many as three specific tasks an hour some days. TV breaks are constantly interrupted – thank goodness for the pause button. A recorded feature film can take several days to get through. Meals? You can be up and down and even when you are not you fear you might be and so remain poised between mouthfuls.

Friends may know your situation and yet they don’t really get it, being hard wired to think of illness as a two-week inconvenience. When in fact some illnesses are life-long and life changing.

Spike Milligan, the father of British comedy, famous for writing the Goon Show for radio – he often left me helpless with laughter - was also a manic depressive. He once wrote that “life was an illness for which the only cure was death”. He trod a thin line between brilliance and insanity.

As for carers, the sheer frustration and anger and  guilt that comes with complaining about how life has turned out was revealed by a comment on a Facebook forum offering support for those in the same boat.

This was a woman caring for her housebound husband, whose poor health makes many demands on her throughout every day.  When friends told her

what a lovely holiday they had she reacted angrily: “Thanks a lot for reminding me how shit my life is.”

To make matters worse, friends tell her she cannot put up with that. “You must have a break; get away for a few days…...”

This is a mirror-image of what have to deal with, and extends to hearing in great detail about family occasions our isolation prevents us from taking part in.

It is all well meaning but unhelpful and serves only to show how misunderstood long term health issues of loved ones often are, for the sick person and their family under immense stress.

It is made more especially sensitive when we are grateful to the same close relatives for their support, chauffeuring us to appointments, spending a lot time on DIY about the house.

In our case, our daughter’s condition would be complex enough without the added weight of autism – she has Ehlers Danlos Syndrome which results in weak connective tissue and Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia -  the slightest movement sends her heart rate soaring and her blood pressure to plummet.

She ticks all the autism boxes and now suffers with PDA.

These various conditions have left her in a poor mental state with severe sensory issues – everything is too loud, too bright. She has cut herself off from friends, the radio, television, and social media. Doesn’t read.

Spends most of the day lying down in bed.

But now and again she will laugh or chuckle when we are attending to her, she will sometimes smile. Which makes it all the more of a mystery as to why, how, she can bear to remain in that one room for years. It’s simple, movement is too painful. And the world outside too demanding.

We know of others like this.

Outside help in the form of social welfare can help with personal care, but this interaction with strangers only raises the anxiety still further and can be counterproductive so it can only happen once in a blue moon.

Autistic people we learn are very clever because of their “neurodivergent” brains - as distinct from the rest of us - the “neurotypical”. Autism has driven the Silicon Valley revolution!

The downside is autistic people are unable to comprehend social behaviours considered typical by the rest of the world.  So they may shy away from group activities because they can’t figure it out.

Autistic people are wired differently.

In trying to fit in, they will mask their feelings in an attempt to act “normal”, which puts them under even greater mental stress.

And with this comes greater anxiety which is off the scale.

Enter stage right, Pathological Demand Avoidance, or Extreme Demand Avoidance.

This means to avoid doing anything for yourself, or to do as little as possible. And to get others to do things for you. The aim being to remain in control, which they plainly cannot do in the neurotypical world.

Professor Tony Attwood and Dr. Michelle Garnett revealed 10 examples of this behaviour typical of autism.

 Professor Attwood is considered to be one of the world’s foremost experts on Autism Spectrum Disorder. Dr. Garnett is a clinical psychologist who has specialized in autism for nearly three decades.

Here at 10 examples of extreme behaviour typical of autism.

·         I am good at getting around others and making them do as I want

·         I seek to quibble and change rules set by others

·         I have a very rapidly changing mood

·         I am driven by the need to be in charge

·         I blame or target a particular person/persons

·         I have difficulty complying with demands and requests from others unless they are carefully presented

·         I obsessively resist and avoid ordinary demands and requests

·         I ensure any social interaction is on my own terms

·         I know what to do or say to upset particular people

·         I am unaware or indifferent to the differences between myself and figures of authority

 

People with EDS, it has been found, are prone to having PDA.

Not that the NHS cares.

Most doctors remain ignorant of it. And some, flying in the face of scientific research, even dispute it.

The NHS will not engage with this. 

In response to a petition, the  government says it has "no plans for a national service for diagnostic treatment forl hEDS (hypermobility Ehlers Danlos syndrome) or HDS (Hypermobility Spectrum Disorders).

I very much doubt anyone with these conditions  clapped for the NHS during the pandemic.

If you are fat or smoke, that’s a different story.

The NHS spends between £4bn and £6bn on helping the obese and almost £5bn on smoking related illnesses.

Dreams and a nightmare

 

Dreaming again

Woke up this morning feeling fine (apologies to Herman’s Hermits).

I learn that overnight a massive shift in transport thinking has at last given the country the safe cycling conditions campaigners have craved for over the past 100 years.

It was the first positive move to slow down climate change.

We now have cycle lanes and routes and city wide traffic calming which has seen a 50-per cent increase in the numbers cycling utility trips, with many people now cycling short distances instead of driving. 

Wide cycle lanes with traffic controlled junctions and roundabouts give cyclists and pedestrians right of way, in all cities, towns across theUK.

Huge cycle parks for up 10,000 bikes, some in high rise buildings others underground can be found in all towns and cities.

How did this come about?

Well, it started with the invasion by Denmark who had been itching for revenge since the British navy bombed Copenhagen in 1807. They did this to sink the Danish warship fleet and so prevent Napoleon getting his hands on it.

The Dutch – irked by the UK’s decision to quit the EU back in 2016 – threw in their lot with the Danes invoking the spirit of their Viking ancestors who history tell us had troubled us somewhat centuries before.

The combined invasion force which sailed up the Thames met with little resistance from the armed forces disarmed by defence spending cuts.

A new Danish-Dutch government immediately set about reviewing policies to tackle the UK’s dire economical mess.

All the public utilities, such has energy and water, were re-nationalised and the UK re-joined the European Union with the immediate effect that prices in the shops dropped.

Cycling UK became embedded within the mess that is the Department for Transport and given a leading role in transport policy, guided by Dutch and Danish experts.  Shared car ownership became the norm.  Driving licences were restricted to those with genuine need. i.e. No one. Well, far fewer than we see today.

Priority was given to digging out the rot at the centre of government and so all private schools were shut down, starting with Eton and Harrow, the bedrock of the establishment culture which has furnished government with selfish money grabbing silver-spoon types who have always shaped government policy according to their own needs  rather than the public good.

The education system received a huge financial boost to raise the standards of education to provide equal opportunity for all. And so did the NHS, with £billions given the service direct from oil company coffers.

Unlike the French revolution of 1789 when many of the elite were sent to the guillotine, a more benign punishment was dealt out. Many  who have backed conservative policy this past decade were transported to empty housing in West Lancashire, vacated by  their previous owners wishing to avoid imminent flooding from sea level rise caused by global warming .

The new tenants were each given a pair of wellies to be going on with.

However, the serial offenders in the big oil companies and those in government who actively campaigned against climate change science were harshly dealt with.  They despatched to the South Pole and left there on a melting ice floes to await their fate. Would the polar bears get them before the water did? 

We can all dream.

Meanwhile, back in real world Mark Cavendish has crashed out of the Tour de France on stage eight, with a broken collar-bone.  Buggar. Here’s to your 34 road stage wins in your remarkable Career,  Cav, a Tour record.

Step forward the Yates twins – Adam or Simon – to further stir up the race.  Or better still, how about

British champion Fred Wright gets his maiden Tour stage win! We need our spirits lifted.

 

 

 

 

Good times follow the bad

 

The Tour de France Grand Depart from the Basque Country this weekend paid homage to that region’s love of cycle racing, which is on a par to that of bike mad Flanders.

But it also brings vividly to mind past political conflict and violence which have led to bomb attacks on the Tour.

The Basque Country straddles the western Pyrenees of Spain and France and jealousy defends its autonomy.  The violence in recent times came to head between 1959 and 2011 as The Basque National Liberation Movement demanded recognition and separate national identity to Spain.

And the Tour became a target as means of attracting publicity to their cause.

I recall a taste of this myself. I’m sure this was the 1987 Tour when on the eve of the Bayonne to Pau stage a cache of arms was discovered in a house on the route of the next day’s stage, leading to fears of an attack on the race.

The odd thing is I learned first about this from my wife when I phoned her while awaiting the stage results to drop. It was on the news.

Minutes later the press room was called to order for a major announcement. And we stood there in silence, wondering what the implications might be.

Extra security would be provided and I’m not sure if that extended to the armed services or not.

Nevertheless, they were anxious moments.

In previous yeas race vehicles had been bombed overnight – there were no casualties. One of the vehicles was a press car belonging to Britain’s TV commentator Phil Liggett.

On the 87 tour I was sharing a car with Lig and Geoffrey Nicholson and I recall on the morning of the stage crouching down to look underneath the vehicle, for some device or other!

And though we made light of the whole thing, we remained nervous and decided to stay in close contact with other advance vehicles, in case in a solitary vehicle might attract attention.

The day passed without incident, thankfully. And we happily concentrated on the day’s main story.

For the record the stage was won by Holland’s Eric Breukink. Yellow jersey was Charly Mottet.

Stephen Roche famously won the final overall that year.

The Tour is no stranger to protest, usually of the more peaceful and, on occasion, amusing kind.

Blockages by striking workers over job losses and trade disputes were common.

There was the articulated truck driven across the course to block the road for the TTT at Denain in Northern France, forcing the cancellation of the stage when over half the teams were still to complete the course.

 

I saw this first hand because my car was hard on the heels of the team which was suddenly obliged to brake hard by the police escort, who presumably at that moment were told of the truck being driven onto the course just ahead of us.

Very soon Tour officials descended on the scene. There was nothing to be done. The race had been completed disrupted and the only course of action was to cancel.

I recall French farmers in the Alps protesting that price of British lamb was undercutting their own! They underlined their cause in style, by spreading a carpet of sheep droppings along the road for us to drive over.

They targeted the convoy, allowing the riders through with a cheer.

I once heard a story – from a fellow scribe - about how the mayor of a local town drove onto the course ahead of the race, intent on playing lead car.  Tour boss Felix Levitan radioed his police chief and soon the mayor’s limo was surrounded by motards. He thought this was marvellous. Until the motards deftly led him off course and up a side road.

And there was the nice story of the young moped rider who helped the Tour to avoid a blockage of farmers in Belgium.  The race had got wind this before the start and the moped rider approached the race organisation and said he knew a route to avoid the farmers. They consulted the map and agreed, and off went the lad with the world’s greatest race and entourage following meekly behind for several kilometres.  The farmers must have wondered why it had gone so quiet.